After 30 Years of Searching, Woman Discovers She’s Abrosexual – And It Finally Makes Sense
Sexuality isn’t always linear. For some, attraction is something that evolves over time – unpredictable, fluid, and hard to label. For one woman, a decades-long journey of confusion finally led her to a word that made everything click: abrosexual.
“I Thought I Was Just a Lesbian… Then Everything Shifted”
For most of her adult life, Flint described herself as uncertain – not indecisive, but constantly shifting.
“There were times I felt confident identifying as a lesbian,” she shared. “Then a few days or weeks would pass, and I’d feel more in tune with being bisexual. It wasn’t back-and-forth confusion. It was real – my identity truly shifted.”
This internal tug-of-war went on for years. That is, until she stumbled upon the term abrosexual during a late-night scroll through an online forum.
“That moment felt like a deep breath after years of holding it in,” Flint wrote. “I finally had a word that explained me. I felt seen.”
So… What Is Abrosexuality?
According to Healthline, abrosexuality refers to a type of sexual fluidity where someone’s sense of attraction changes frequently. Unlike sexualities defined by specific genders – like heterosexuality, homosexuality, or bisexuality – abrosexuality is focused on the changing nature of desire itself.
A person might feel completely gay one day, pansexual the next, and later experience little to no attraction at all. It’s not a phase. It’s not confusion. It’s a valid identity.
“I don’t fall in love with gender,” Flint explains. “I fall in love with the person. And whether my orientation shifts or not, my commitment doesn’t.”
“Some People Still Demand I Pick a Lane”
Despite feeling more confident in her identity, Flint admits that not everyone understands or respects the label.
“There are always people who demand clarity,” she says. “As if my identity is somehow offensive to them. But just because someone doesn’t recognize a label doesn’t mean it’s not real.”
For Flint, the discovery of abrosexuality wasn’t just about labeling herself – it was about freedom. Freedom to exist without explanation, and freedom to embrace the spectrum of her feelings without guilt.
What Does Being Abrosexual Look Like?
There’s no fixed template for what abrosexuality should look like. Each person experiences it differently.
Healthline outlines several potential ways it can appear:
-
One day, someone may feel romantically drawn to women.
-
Later, they may notice attraction to people of all genders.
-
And at another point, they may experience no attraction at all.
There’s no “standard timeline,” and no need for consistency – that’s exactly what makes this identity so personal.
Representation Matters More Than You Think
Flint’s story is a powerful reminder of the role language plays in self-discovery.
“Growth means learning about yourself in new ways,” she writes. “And I hope someday soon, abrosexuality will just be seen as one more natural variation of human identity – not a trend, not something to be questioned.”
Too often, people spend years feeling broken simply because the vocabulary to describe their experience isn’t mainstream. But stories like Flint’s show how finding the right word can bring a lifetime of peace.
Have you heard of abrosexuality before? What are your thoughts on the growing spectrum of identities? Share this story and let’s open the conversation.